Thursday, January 26, 2012

Mood Swings

Holy Shit, I've been a real asshole lately!  Lack of movement, sunlight, and thrilling moments have really soured my perceptions of the world around me.  That was until today when I cleansed myself in the waters of tacky singletrack, Dale's Pale Ale, and felt the presence of Todd tha God.  Now I feel much, much better.  Simple, huh?  Yep.

La Espina Dorsal del Diablo con Todd "El Dios"  

Ahora. Vaya con dos ruedas, mijo.
- Zeta

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Dudes do Booze Cruise to (oskar) Blues

Wowzer.  Mitch Dood, ChadMandingo, Andrew, and myself took advantage of the awesome weather and got together to do a nice road ride from Fort Collins out to Lyons.  I love this ride.  We start by going out around Horsetooth Reservoir, then go through Masonville and take all the scenic backroads all the way to Lyons.  It's nothing but mountains, bluffs, horse ranches, and Longs Peak looming over you the entire ride.  To top it off, the ride ends at Oskar Blues brewery in downtown Lyons.  They have the best menu around.  It's southern-fare home cookin based, but they also have HUGE portions of bar food.  To top it off, I'm on a big Oskar Blues kick and just love slamming their beers.  It doesn't hurt they have tons of tasty whiskey too.  In the basement they have an 80s arcade with about 20 machines (of which I hold the #1 spot on about 10 of em!)  Not only that, one of the best Fort Collins country bands (Turn 4) was playing there that very night.  I'm telling you what more could you want?  Thanks to Nick for being our designated driver for the ride home.  We needed it.  With the rowdy bunch of boozers I was riding with, this was a seriously, seriously fun ride.  It's a good thing that they don't have a strip club there.  I think the clinical term for what I was experiencing is known as "Severe Over-Stimulation".  Holy shit!

Alright, let's get started!  (watch the level in that whiskey bottle get lower and lower...)

Top of the first hill.  *gulp.

Top of the second hill. *gulp.

The outlaws of Masonville...

Just cruisin.....

... for a boozin.
Thumbs awaaaay.....

No comment.
Unfortunately we managed to run outta gas.  Sad face.

Made it!
Arcade THROW DOWN!  There is no second place in the Oskar Blues Arcade.  Just first loser.

Ultimate Noser

After all that alcohol it seemed my motor functions were still enough to rock some arcade games.  Then it was time to load it up and head back after more shots and a SICK performance by the band Turn 4.  By the middle of that performance my motor skills were sufficiently dulled that I tripped over a floor monitor and fell on stage during a song about 2-steppin.  Obviously looking like a wasteoid.

Kennel up!

34-Masonville-Lyons Trax
34-Masonville-Lyons Profile

See?  Now who says a simple road ride can't be fun?  Not this guy.  It sure beats slogging through mud and eroding my favorite mountain bike trails.  Just cause of where we live, we gotta ride road through the winter.  Or drive on out to the western slope....  That'll be comin up!

Thanks again for checkin in.  Stay in motion.
Zness da Pness

UPDATE 1-11-12:
I just found a link to the Turn 4 song that proves Fort Collins country is the fucking absolute best ever!  This is a link the song they were playin when I got so drunk I tripped on the floor monitor and fell on stage.  Lyrically, it captures a feeling I have often.    It's called Girl Like You by Turn 4.  So sick.  Go to their show and kiss a pretty girl in cowboy boots.  You won't regret it.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Rist-Buckhorn 2012

Just went out and hammered this ride again on my NEW singlespeed.  Sorry, no new photos, but I got a giftcard from Grammy for xmas to put towards a new digital camera and should be able to post some riding photos soon.  Until then, text only suckas.  Not much has changed about this ride since the last time I did it, except that I was all by my lonesome. 

By the way, here is a hot pic of the new and improved fixie, but all you ballers out there can do me a favor and keep your eyes out for my old one that some jerk-off stole.  It's really easy to know it's mine because it's a mixture of hot-pink, camouflage, and primer.  It also has my goddamn name right there on the downtube! 

New Hotness

Old Sweet-Ass "Zness" fixie that got jacked.

I guess I wasn't really alone on this loop because I have my new George Carlin audiobook that constantly re-assures me that I'm not the one with the fucking problem...  it's everybody else that's so goddamn stupid!

Keep hittin it all winter,